Saturday, July 21, 2018

RIP the Black Beast

281,633 miles, nine years, six or seven trips to Portland, as well as LA, Bakersfield, Fresno, SF, Oakland, Reno and daily drives to work and back.

Multiple excursions off road at Scratch and Spit, one giant dent from a rocky Nevada hill climb gone wrong, miles and miles of dusty, rocky roads, but always the Beast brought us back.

The epic trip to Reno and back over two passes one Thanksgiving, returning via Highway 88 over Carson Pass, at night, in blowing snow, frozen roads, at no more than 25 mph tops, with the low temp registering at 7 degrees Fahrenheit, all in 4 wheel drive, yet managing a safe delivery to our gate at home without a detour into any ditch or over any of the yawning cliffs that line that lonely route.

My extreme tolerance for cracks in the windshield, chips and stars because for sure I knew that as soon as I paid for new glass another rock would fly up and chip it again, probably within a day or two.  Finally, the one big windshield crack started connecting with a big star, and I simply had to fork out the cash, or risk a catastrophic and sudden collapse.  Just before the end, I counted one big frown shaped crack that spanned the entire length of the windshield, and seven chips and stars. 

The quirky idiosyncrasies it developed over time that I either learned to tolerate or found that even the dealer couldn't fix.  My favorite was the need to jiggle the wand that controlled the turn signals nearly every day to get it to work.  Everything that the wand controlled - the turn signals, the high beams, the windshield wipers - were dead until I jiggled it for a bit, then the wipers would make one pass on their own, and then inexplicably everything worked just fine until I turned the truck off again.   I'd have to repeat this nearly every time upon restarting.  The dealer was never able to figure that one out, and since I had a fix that took only a few seconds, I lived with that for years.

I'll miss its ability to slow crawl over some incredible rocky stretches of bad road in eastern California and Nevada.  All I needed to do was put it in four wheel drive, go really slow and carefully place my tires, and I could creep that machine over some truly bad roads.  It never got stuck, although there were a few places that took two or three tries to get over without damage.  Because of this I never stressed about getting in or out.   It always was up for the challenge.

Happily putting noisy Nevada Racing Stripes down the side of the truck while deep in the Nevada basin and range country, by forcing the truck down dirt tracks severely overgrown with sage brush. Think a hundred fingernails on a chalkboard. 

Collecting drifts of yellow and orange aspen leaves inside the cab from driving through miles of aspen country during the fall with the windows down.  I learned I loved the smell of wet desert ground and wet sage brush after a desert rain, which explains the windows being down.

The tool box I inherited from my Dad, with all his tools and some of mine that I stashed in the camper shell and hauled everywhere I went, so I'd be prepared for anything.  Same with the enormous crow bar that I picked up in my youth driving tomato trucks, and which has been in every machine I've owned, and on every single trip for three decades.  Because of all that good karma, and truthfully, a lot of timely maintenance, I never needed the help of these old friends in a pinch.  But I knew they were there, backing me up faithfully.

The antique police siren that my pack rat uncle brought up to me one year, which he got at a yard sale, and which no doubt was originally on the light bar of a 50's era cop car.  The LT and I installed that under the hood of the Beast, so that when you lifted the hood it would rise up out of the way, and which we controlled with a toggle switch from inside the cab.  Imagine the fun.

The Ah-oo-gah horn we also put in behind the grill, and controlled with another toggle switch.  Once all five of us - the whole fam - had packed into the beast and driven up to Theresa's Italian Restaurant in Jackson.  We feasted royally on fine Italian food, and then the LT wanted to drive it home.  On the way down one of the country roads we passed two stripling youth of about 14, walking along the road and probably contemplating some youthful mischief.  Just as we passed, the LT flicked the toggle, the Ah-oo-gah horn blared, and the young punks both jumped straight up in shocked surprise.  We laughed for miles.  Good times.

The last picture of a smoothly functioning beast, appropriately on Monitor Pass high in the Sierra Nevada, on a bright spring day.



Towing the teardrop.


Flying drones from the top of the world.




The Beast's natural habitat, the aspen country just before the snow flies and winter sets in.  Heck, that's my natural habitat as well.


A young LT learns off road driving in the beast.


When it was new and before the camper shell.


Approaching Carson Pass from the east with a load of youth.


My favorite trips with the Beast were the multiple times it took me and  the LT and his buddies shooting up in the mountains.  The Beast got us in and out with all our gear every time.


A healthy activity for young men.



 The other day it began making a noise from the engine, and it rapidly worsened.  I took it in, and it's a major repair, estimated at 7 to 10k.  They tell me they'll need to keep it for many weeks.   I doubt any part of this truck, or any truck for that matter, is engineered to last much longer than 200 thousand miles, and I'm at 281 with this one.  And nine years old.

At this many miles and given it's age, it's time to move on, and spend that money on a down payment for the next Beast, I think.  It's been years since I've had a car payment, and I'm not looking forward to that.  I visited the local GM dealer, who has a really nice bait truck out front, something any red blooded man would lust for.  72 thousand dollars.  Good Lord, can they sell even one at that price?

Maybe instead something more reasonable, something like this?  Son of the Beast?




23 comments:

  1. You got your moneys worth, 281K is pretty awesome

    I would give you the truck that work bought for me a couple years ago if I could.
    2015 Ram 2500 heavy duty, 4 door, 6.4 L Hemi. It rides worse than my 05 Wrangler.
    My work provided vehicle before that was an AWD Escape - perfect for my job.
    I work for morons.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I was aiming for 300k, and I got it pretty close.

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  2. Letting go of an old truck can be a lot like losing an old friend.

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    Replies
    1. No kidding, especially when you contemplate all the fun times that came with it.

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  3. My Toyota FJ is a 2007 model. 11 years old. I've simply replaced everything that even might be a little worn and the engine is still turning. It's like your beast. It's almost like family. Not a daily driver though. I keep it for vacations and trail runs, which is a different equation than your beast.

    I like the new rig. Let's see if you can squeeze 300K out of it?

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  4. I have spent a lot of time/miles in the Carson Pass/Caples Lake area.
    Love it up there.
    Ford Super Duty 6.0 diesel 115'000 miles w/brush scratches boulder dents.
    Just got back from Idaho in her.

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  5. I'm driving a 12 year old Silverado that I like very much. Thankfully it's only a hair or three over 100K on the thing. I'm really hoping to not have to buy another truck before I meet my end.

    The new white truck looks nice. Hopefully it's got the same stuff inside as the Black Beast and serves you well for many years.

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    Replies
    1. I'm going to do everything I can to make that happen.

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  6. 10 Large for a motor?

    Seems like a LOT of scratch.

    I had my 03 Ram 2500 5.9 diesel for 16 years and 390K miles. Rust got me though, stuff was failing faster than I could fix it due to the salt corrosion.

    Suggestion: On yer new one, after the break in, go Synthetic Motor oOl and never use conventional.

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    Replies
    1. I hear that. I think I got so many miles in part due to using synthetic.

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  7. My '97 Ram 25 4WD still has < 100K miles, just barely. Ordered it from the factory, paid cash, everything heavy duty with the V-10. The dashboard is literally disintegrating, but....it's paid for, eh? And so far, it hasn't let me down. Hard to walk away from that. Take your time, keep your eyes open for one lightly used, keep a little cash on the margins for dressing it the way you want it. Synthetic's the only way to go if you have any kind of cold weather, for sure.

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  8. Find you a nice used dodge Truck, skip the payments. Look up LKQ and price a motor you mite luck up.

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  9. I feel sad for my monster now. only 67.7K in the last 15 years. its nice to be seeing everything as I go. traction out the wazoo what with 7000lbs empty sitting on the tires. I was pissed when diesel hit $3.50 back in 2005, but thats the price of fun. the great Rocky Mountains is where I go with the blue monster. very stock. do all the maintenance myself ever since the first trip to the dealer earned them a big fail. just this week had to renew the front axle u-joints(a fun job) and next week heading for New Hampshire. gonna be a fine trip

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  10. Come on !! 9 years 230,000 + . My Toyota van , 18 years 320,000 + runs like a clock, cracked windshield and all. "Jiggle nothing" . Good luck on the newby.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If you are good to them, they'll be good to you!

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  11. You can get a 1975 Yugo on eBay for next to nothing. Only catch is you have to pick it up in Yugoslavia.

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    Replies
    1. A gal pal of mine took me along to validate her purchase of a Yugo. I said, "walk away. Don't even touch it, it might break."

      So of course she bought it. Next she got stuck; couldn't get it out of her driveway, the brake shoes had stuck to the rims. Had to take off all the tires and belt hell out of the rims & shoes to get them loose.

      I was wrong, though- Yugos don't break. You've just got to belt them with big hammers a lot to keep 'em moving, is all. They prefer to rest.

      Delete
  12. 2005 f-250. 5.4l gas. 431,000 and counting. One trans rebuild, no major engine issues.

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  13. Re-manufactured engine? http://www.atkvege.com/content/ or https://www.jasperengines.com/. These are great. The rest??? Junk IMO.

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  14. 96 f350 7.3 power stroke. 325,000 and still running strong. Good luck with the new "beast". My dad was a dodge man for over 40 years. Really enjoy your site. Thanks.

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