They were hoping to spend the holidays there, but now, because of the sudden heavy snowfall, they were going nowhere. There's no way the family BMW would handle three feet of snow.
"Oh well," Mr. Geller announced, "Since we're snowed in, let's make the best of it and break out the eggnog!'
Unbeknownst to the fully visible and innocent family celebrating inside, the ravenous wolf pack approached…
To be continued in the comments.
Mr Geller had combined the milk, cloves, vanilla, and cinnamon in a saucepan, and applied the heat slowly bring milk mixture to a boil. He then mixed egg yolks and sugar in a large bowl whisking until fluffy. He then stirred in Appleton Estate Jamaican rum, cream, vanilla, and nutmeg. Geller realized he had forgotten the secret ingredient and had to go to the basement for a bottle of cognac. He selected a bottle from the wine rack that was next to the gun safe.
ReplyDeleteBeing a prudent man, all that flashy optics just wasn't his thing. After all, if you can't shoot with iron sights.. and he has seen the results of a dropped weapon or dead battery. Of course he picked the PA 10 with an Armalite carry handle/open sights and an A2 stock. .308 just feels better than a .223 going in. The Norinco M1911A1 was for close in work, after all.
ReplyDeleteBut then he heard his 3 year old daughter crying upstairs. He returned the guns to the safe, made sure it was surely locked and proceeded up the stairs. With the brandy of course.
ReplyDeleteJust then a knock came on the door. A van load of cheerleaders had gotten stuck in the snow and was looking for shelter. "Hmmmm" thought Mr Geller. "I think I need more eggnog". They all agreed and began making themselves comfortable.
ReplyDeleteOver the sound of ZZ Top on the stero, the crowd heard the canine yelps from outside.
ReplyDeleteGrabbing a Tommy gun from the closet, Mr. Geller went out to check on it. At first nothing, but on closer review....carnage. Wolves torn to pieces, dead and dieing. All evidence seemed to lead the unthinkable, Bigfoot.
"Hmmmm" thought Mr Geller. "I think I need more eggnog".
ReplyDeleteUpon reentering Mr Geller found that the cheerleaders had really been hitting the eggnog and had started to ...
ReplyDeleteMr. Geller waited till the silent slanty-eyed enemy got within 50 feet and then he banged 3 times on the clacker. BOOM, 700 steel balls traveling in a 60 degree arc left only bloody fur on the once white snow. Now children, he said in a commanding voice go to bed and sleep tight.
ReplyDeleteFortunately he'd had the foresight to order several examples of the popular FACE TOWARDS WOLVES units from the ACME catalog only last month, and they'd recently arrived in the mail...
ReplyDelete:)
DeleteIt was nearly dinner time, a perfect time to enjoy an eggnog or two. Mrs. Geller poured one for her husband and one for herself. She added two shots of rum to her husband's mug and one to hers. The children, Sam and Naaomi each got a glass but with just rum extract.
ReplyDeleteThey settled in front of their fireplace to enjoy the touch of the flames to the brick. The house was dark so they could see them best.
Mrs Geller took a sip from her mug, smiled at Mr. Geller, and went to check on the oven. It was then she found out that the power had gone out, "Probably from the snow on the lines".
When she returned to the fireplace she reported the power outage and asked whether the family might consider cooking some Brats over the flames if it didn't come back on soon.
Mr. Geller was sipping his second eggnog when Naomi complained that she was getting cold. "Of course. If the power was out the furnace wouldn't work."
Mr. Geller had been talking with his new neighbors who had told him about the frequent outages during the winter. He was prepared. He had put away a nice kerosene heater and a couple five-gallon containers of kerosene.
He finished his nog and went to the garage to retrieve the heater. He brought it into the living room and went back for the fuel. He told Sam to close all the bedroom doors. They would heat the living room with the heater. It probably wouldn't do for the entire house.
Naomi went with her mother to help put together something they could eat. There was no shortage. They had stocked up because the market was a long drive away.
Mr. Geller had never used the heater before so it was understandable that he had to read the directions two or three times. He had forgotten a funnel so he made do with a rolled-up piece of newspaper. He wound up spilling nearly as much as he got into the tank.
Just to be safe he moved the heater away from the spill. The piezo igniter on the heater worked perfectly. They were making heat in a jiffy. The kids brought blankets and pillows from the bedrooms and set up pallets for everyone.
They all had something to eat and another egg nog and then they turned in, confident that, even if the temperature in the house got chilly they would have enough quilts. It was like a camp-out.
Everyone went to sleep.
Sometime between midnight and first light everyone slept themselves away. No one had considered the possibility that the heater would produce carbon monoxide.
The following day the kerosene ran out in the heater and the bodies began to stiffen. The wolves smelled death. One of them found a way into the house.
The animals were no longer ravenous - at least for a while.
The End.
DeleteMr. Geller grimaced, hack..gag 'sspuuutttthh..*scratch, scratch*. What the H#@!
DeleteChester, Naomi's long haired cat had curled up to sleep next to Mr. Gellar’s head. His dreams were interrupted as he inhaled - what turned out to be Chester’s tail...
"OMG I swallowed a hairball" he gurgled, what the... aaawwcckk…cough. He stumbled over to the sink and slugged down another glass of eggnog.
The memory of his bizarre dream came to a furry end when a sound from outside caught his attention.
"Henry the Eighth, I am, I am"
Blinking, he rubbed his eyes to clear his vision - out the window he couldn’t believe what he was seeing.
The cheerleaders had polished off all of the eggnog and most of the other adult beverages in the house and were frolicking in the hot tub. "Hmmm" thought Mr Geller, "I have no idea how this relates to Henry the Eighth but who am I to argue?"
ReplyDelete